Made in Kenya? No thank you!
Posted by diaznash
Sometimes i reminisce about my country. How much i love it and the people in it. How much I just want to move around all the 47 counties and meet all the great people from all around. The perfect road trip at our now nearly perfect roads. Its a great country with the most beautiful and unique map shape. High mountain, equator almost dividing it into two. I mean, its like God started creation from this point. Just lovely but…… scratch all that.
Now let’s get real.
Should i start by blaming the government or should i blame that we have too many tribes fiercely competing or should i just say we are outright jealous of each other. All tribalism aside, we Kenyans hate almost everything about our county but we are still one of the most proud people in the world. Get the irony? No? You already hating on me!!!! Be it a technological innovation or a musician releasing a new video or a clothing line, we always seem to prefer foreign things to ours. We have become so dependent on foreign things that we rarely have time to look at that good dead happening just next door.
The government has had us so dependent on foreign aid to the extent while it’s planning its budget, it already knows how much they will need to borrow not as loans but aid and favors from rich countries.
Our institutions have adopted the government style and are very fast turning their company structures into NGOs so they can cash in on free money from outside while they pretend to be washing the feet of people infested with jiggers.
Our media is killing us with soap operas and other foreign movies during prime hours and all we can relate to is how to fall in love and be heart Brocken like the Mexicans do in their movies making our girls give us men very unrealistic targets to meet.
Our musicians know nothing about zilizopendwa which were our music roots. They sing and dress like american hip hop artists and expect me to buy their music which in the first place isn’t any close to the standard of the american hip hop artists they emulate. They can’t even sing with a live band support and attending their live shows involves a dj playing a cd of their songs and all they do is tell us to put our hands up.
Our movie and tv show production houses are busy trying to teach us how English words should be pronounced and how to twist your tongue while saying the word tweng. Lack of continuity in their programs full of half baked stories and to make it worse, poor production… That one second i see the camera peeping. *face palm*
Our social joints dying faster than they came because they’d rather have ten white people just dancing with one drink the whole night than allow me inside to spend all my rent money and have fun. Spending two hours as i wait for my tea because am less important than the guy in a suit who ordered a cappuccino or the white guy waiting for his water and croissant.
I hear you invented a new hairstyle. Okay. Will crucify you in twitter.
You mean a Kenyan has built a speed governor?? Aiii!!! That won’t work. What!! A kid who isn’t a physicist has built a plane? Tell him he is 100yrs late, thanks to the police he isn’t allowed to test it. What do you mean this software has been patented here in Kenya! Ill continue using the devil i know from Microsoft. No am not interested in buying sugar from Kenya. It’s too brown and sweet it will give me diabetes. I have seen all the big five animals in national geographic i don’t think visiting a game park is a good idea. Keep off our elephants but for 500k I’ll give you two tasks.
Made in Kenya? From Kenya? By a Kenyan??? No thanks. Let’s create China Town in Machakos.
Solutions?? So many but am just too lazy to right them because most of my readers aren’t Kenyans. Sigh!